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No Ending to Mental Health Awareness Month, Week Five in the Time of Transition
![No Ending to Mental Health Awareness Month, Week Five in the Time of Transition No Ending to Mental Health Awareness Month, Week Five in the Time of Transition](images/Life-SizedCourage/cache/images/Life-SizedCourage/proportion/IMG_1108_w140_h140/IMG_1108_05300144.jpg)
May 30, 2021 by Janet Zinn
We’re at the end of May, which is Mental Health Awareness Month. That doesn’t mean we can ditch the care we require for our mental well-being. Perhaps now more than ever we must hone in on our emotional welfare. As we face many more options than what had been available just a month ago, I find that I am oversaturated with hopes, desires and hesitation. Listening to my intuition is key, but the noise of opening up, facing all we can do, what we “should do,” along with what we’d like to keep from our time in the pandemic, can feel dizzying. I face many choices, while I proceed at a low speed.
The Joy and Trepidation of Seeing Smiles, Week Three in the Time of Transition
![The Joy and Trepidation of Seeing Smiles, Week Three in the Time of Transition The Joy and Trepidation of Seeing Smiles, Week Three in the Time of Transition](images/Life-SizedCourage/cache/images/Life-SizedCourage/proportion/IMG_0991_w140_h140/IMG_0991_05160336.jpg)
May 16, 2021 by Janet Zinn
I woke up early and ran to the East River promenade to get a glimpse of the sunrise. I almost forgot my mask, but quickly put it in my pocket testing the waters of walking down the block without one. No one was wearing masks but the few of us out were all at least 20 feet apart. That felt comfortable enough for me.
Emotions Ebb & Flow, Week Twenty-Eight of the New Abnormal
![Emotions Ebb & Flow, Week Twenty-Eight of the New Abnormal Emotions Ebb & Flow, Week Twenty-Eight of the New Abnormal](images/Life-SizedCourage/cache/images/Life-SizedCourage/proportion/IMG_4476_w140_h140/IMG_4476_07100504.jpg)
Jul 10, 2022 by Janet Zinn
The cycling of moods continues. Today I’m happy. It’s beautiful outside. I get to walk on fairly empty sidewalks, and I’m ticking things off my to-do list. Earlier this week I was crestfallen. Too many tragedies and so much shared pain in the world. I find it fascinating how the ups and downs shift from day to day. Well, really, from moment to moment.
Pandemic Envy, Week 47 in the Time of Coronavirus
Jan 31, 2021 by Janet Zinn
Pandemic Envy, Week 47 in the Time of Coronavirus
We have become accustomed to the average pandemic envy like seeing those who prepare feasts as a way to get through this time of Coronavirus. Many of us have felt jealousy for acquaintances in larger homes. The more exhausted have longed for the energy cited in posts of new hobbies or accomplishments. Some parents envy those with no children, or those with safe help for their families. A number of people who feel alone have been envious of those who post happy couple or family portraits. Individuals who feel trapped with their families begrudge others who they imagine live blissfully alone. Now add to that the newer vaccine envy.
Without distractions I’m able to feel my emotions strongly. Sometimes this...
We have become accustomed to the average pandemic envy like seeing those who prepare feasts as a way to get through this time of Coronavirus. Many of us have felt jealousy for acquaintances in larger homes. The more exhausted have longed for the energy cited in posts of new hobbies or accomplishments. Some parents envy those with no children, or those with safe help for their families. A number of people who feel alone have been envious of those who post happy couple or family portraits. Individuals who feel trapped with their families begrudge others who they imagine live blissfully alone. Now add to that the newer vaccine envy.
Without distractions I’m able to feel my emotions strongly. Sometimes this...
You Never Know, Week 46 in the Time of Coronavirus
Jan 24, 2021 by Janet Zinn
Sometimes I find myself quick to judge. I hear a whiny individual at a Zoom meeting, and I silently groan. I also know that there have been times, and I chance to say there are still times, in which I am the one who warrants another’s groan. In my more open-minded moments, I remember that everyone is trying the best they can. We are all going through this pandemic, and there’s nothing easy about that. But there are other times when my exhaustion and impatience take over and I am unforgiving of anyone who annoys me from the selfishly maskless to virtual-meeting squeaky wheels.
Something I’ve noticed recently in my professional and personal life is how instantaneously we are to jump from one emotional state to...
What We Don't Know, Week 45 in the Time of Coronavirus
Jan 17, 2021 by Janet Zinn
I have to admit that I wasn’t sure that the judge I watched numerous times on Law and Order was Fran Lebowitz. It looked like her, but was she a doppelganger, or was she, in fact, the writer? After watching “Pretend it’s a City,” Martin Scorsese’s excellent (in my opinion) docu-series of Fran Lebowitz, I was happy to learn that, yes, it was her as Judge Janice Goldberg in the original Law & Order.
The short series on Netflix was a delightful, laughter-filled escape from current events this past week. I learned a lot, evaluated my own thinking, and admired FL’s ability to speak her personal truths, thoughts I often have, but don’t share aloud. Somehow the cable show also had me pondering on the...
Boy, Oh, Boy, Week 44 in the Time of Coronavirus
Jan 10, 2021 by Janet Zinn
Yesterday I hit the wall. Before I lost all steam, I had lofty plans. I had research to do. There is always cleaning and organizing. I was behind on my writing. Yet, by the time I was three fourths of the way through a walk in Central Park, I felt as if I was dragging my leaden legs on the southern arc of the Reservoir. When I finally reached home, I couldn’t get my sweats on fast enough. Then Lucy had to go out. I love her, and also dearly wished there was someone else who would have taken her out. I was able to speak with a friend from the other coast, and that gave me a pleasurable energy shot. Though life in California is as fraught as it...
Cautiously Optimistic, Week 43 in the Time of Coronavirus
Jan 03, 2021 by Janet Zinn
Is this really a Happy New Year? Yes, we survived 2020. And, yet, recalling how happy we were to be in a new decade just a year ago, we are constantly reminded of the unexpected turn of events in March.
In this first weekend of the new year, we take stock of the meaning of “hindsight is 2020.” Relieved that 2020 is behind us, our memories are raw from all we witnessed, and all we faced personally. I now know the impact of ongoing stress on my body and mind. I am just beginning to understand what is required to sooth myself and support others going through the intensity of extreme tension. Sometimes it means reaching out and caring for someone, taking the attention off myself. Other...
So Long 2020, Week 42 in the Time of Coronavirus
Dec 27, 2020 by Janet Zinn
Before the end of this week we will welcome in a new year. Never will there have been a greater collective sigh throughout the globe than at the rotating midnight hour of 1/1/2021. We all faced many challenges throughout the year. And we all learned essential truths about ourselves. I learned that doing less was a relief. I learned that patience is not an end point, but an ongoing process. I learned to use my crankier tendences as a reflection on what vulnerabilities I am attempting to protect. I learned that I still have a lot to learn in asking for help. Plus, I learned that 2020 gave us endless opportunities to learn. I also learned that even with the possibility of learning, sometimes learning to relax was the...
Snow, Week 41 in the Time of Coronavirus
Dec 20, 2020 by Janet Zinn
Initially there were grave warnings about the snowstorm that was going to plague the Northeast. When it started to fall, the winds were strong, and walking home from work was a bit of an effort. The following day there were hills with footsteps at the curbsides. Crossing the street took balance and navigation. Patience was needed, as only one person at a time could reach the next corner. Each person had their own pace, based on age, winter fitness, and footwear. Good snow boots were the best. So happy that past winters required me to find the right boots.
By Friday I was ready for a walk in the park. The park closest to me, Carl Shurz, had sledding children with their parents. It was hard to tell who was...
Simple Pleasures, Week 40 in the Time of Coronavirus
Dec 13, 2020 by Janet Zinn
I was listening to early Joni Mitchell this early morning as the sun rose. Lucy and I were out for the first walk of the day. The weather is warm for December, and lovely in the tranquil dark. It was quiet with the occasional runner or dog passing us as they started their day.
It’s easy for me to recognize how special these moments are. As we make our way through this pandemic I find that these ten months have worn on me. At this point I really don’t want to do anything. Which is all the more reason I am appreciative of every small pleasure I encounter. This morning it was being next to Lucy as she sniffed and I watched the day begin. Now it’s sitting down...
Thanksgiving, Gratitude & Disappointment, Week 37 in the Time of Coronavirus
Nov 22, 2020 by Janet Zinn
There’s no doubt that this is a Thanksgiving like no other. Many will spend Thanksgiving, if it is being spent at all, without loved ones. In a large number of cases, it will be the first holiday without someone because they died, either of Covid-19 or from other causes. It’s hard to feel thankful for these facts. We can embody gratitude for what we’ve had in the past. Or we may feel grateful for not having to be social when we’re not up to seeing anyone. However, that’s a far cry from the delight of festivities of past years.
Gratitude and its cousin, appreciation, can feel like a burden in times of fear, sadness and loss. I am all for gratitude journals, and gratitude as a tenet of...
Virtually a Relationship
![Virtually a Relationship Virtually a Relationship](images/Life-SizedCourage/cache/images/Life-SizedCourage/blog/janetzinn_files_wordpress_com_2019_06/proportion/images_8_w140_h140/images_8_02090744.jpeg)
Jun 26, 2019 by Janet Zinn
Sometimes, as a therapist, it’s hard to leave my work brain at home. While minding my own business, or so I thought, at a local restaurant, I came to observe a young professional sitting at the next table. He was with his colleague. They were engaged in a heated discussion about the merits of outsourcing versus in-house accounting support. Not a conversation that was of any interest to me. At one point, the late-20-something guy next to me, a fit man with dark hair and a trim mustache, and a tailored blue shirt sans jacket, took out his phone and commanded Siri to find a study that supports the cost effectiveness of outsourcing. He had been speaking to his younger colleague,...
No, Thank You
![No, Thank You No, Thank You](images/Life-SizedCourage/cache/images/Life-SizedCourage/blog/janetzinn_files_wordpress_com_2019_01/proportion/images_1_w140_h140/images_1_02090744.jpeg)
Jan 01, 2019 by Janet Zinn
The New Year’s Eve race in Central Park is an iconic run given by New York Roadrunners. It features fireworks at midnight, just as the run begins. I had great plans to participate in the Midnight Run tonight. It started in 1978, but I didn’t hear about until the mid-80’s, when my roommate, Astrid ran it. I thought it was amazing. I wasn’t a runner, so it never occurred to me that I would ever spend my New Year’s eve in the park running. And, yet, a few years ago I did my first run. I ran two more times, starting with my cousin Zena, and then with a friend the next year. Two years ago I was on my own.
It’s...
It’s...
Running Again
![Running Again Running Again](images/Life-SizedCourage/cache/images/Life-SizedCourage/blog/janetzinn_files_wordpress_com_2018_04/proportion/img_1337_w140_h140/img_1337_02090744.jpg)
Apr 23, 2018 by Janet Zinn
I ran my first race in over a year. It was slow process, both recovering from benign injuries, as well as running 15-minute miles this morning. In the past months I went through acupuncture, medical massage and physical therapy putting Humpty Dumpty back together again. So, tentatively, step by step I took on Central Park’s Drive.
What I noticed right away was the throngs who passed me as I inched my way forward. I am no stranger to being left behind. In elementary school I often was picked last in kickball, more for my lack of popularity than for any inability to kick and catch the ball. In junior high school I was not asked to parties. I awkwardly went to school...
One Step in Front of the Other
![One Step in Front of the Other One Step in Front of the Other](images/Life-SizedCourage/cache/images/Life-SizedCourage/blog/janetzinn_files_wordpress_com_2017_09/proportion/9bcc6173bfec0f98_w140_h140/9bcc6173bfec0f98_02090743.jpg)
Sep 05, 2017 by Janet Zinn
When I was 10 years old I was allowed to walk on Haddonfield-Berlin Road, crossing highways entrances and exits to go to The Woodcrest Shopping Center. For a short time they had The Jerry Lewis Movie Theater, and I could get in for 50 cents, the amount of my allowances after chores. Or, I would go to W.T. Grant’s, deemed a twenty-five cent department store, but more of a five and dime. that sold colorful birds, toys, clothes, plastic jewelry, and featured a lunch counter. I was much too shy to go to the counter alone. But I loved getting lost in the aisles ending up with some sort of sweet. There was also Crest Lanes where I could bowl....
The Fluctuating Value of Sleep
![The Fluctuating Value of Sleep The Fluctuating Value of Sleep](images/Life-SizedCourage/cache/images/Life-SizedCourage/blog/janetzinn_files_wordpress_com_2017_07/proportion/images_w140_h140/images_02090743.png)
Jul 15, 2017 by Janet Zinn
When I was ten-years-old I was going to sleep-away camp for the first time. I was leaving for 2 weeks at a bare-bones Y camp in Medford, New Jersey. The night before I left I was atwitter with anticipation. What should I wear? I want a low key, yet cool look. In 1970 that meant hot pants and a tight colorful tee. I’d save my red hot pants for a dressy camp night. And, while awake, going over my list of flashlights and swimwear, I decided I’d arrive wearing denim shorts with my tie-dye t-shirt. It wasn’t snug, but it was cool enough to appear nonchalant.
That decided, I stayed up all night nervous about the friends I’d make, and wanting...
What I'm Not
![What I'm Not What I'm Not](images/Life-SizedCourage/cache/images/Life-SizedCourage/blog/janetzinn_files_wordpress_com_2017_02/proportion/unknown_1_w140_h140/unknown_1_02090743.jpeg)
Feb 06, 2017 by Janet Zinn
We just took a trip to a resort in Punta Cana, in the Dominican Republic. It was beautiful. The weather was warm and clear, and everyone was friendly. I wanted to enjoy this vacation. Last year was hard and I was looking forward to some R&R. But the food, though plentiful, went from bland to awful. The amenities promised were elusive or not as advertised. The other travelers seemed to be content, but I couldn’t help notice the missing details, the absence of my desired holiday away. I would go for a run on the beach, grateful for the easy breeze, and the laps of the ocean. Yet, I kept thinking of all the things I didn’t like about being...
Back to the Basics
![Back to the Basics Back to the Basics](images/Life-SizedCourage/cache/images/Life-SizedCourage/blog/janetzinn_files_wordpress_com_2016_07/proportion/unknown_1_w140_h140/unknown_1_02090743.jpeg)
Jul 04, 2016 by Janet Zinn
I learned to iron from my mom, but not before I scorched a shirt or two. Cotton and Polyester were the fabrics of my childhood. And, although I liked my Danskin striped shirts and ribbed pleated pants, cotton was the classier choice for anything other than playing in our Haddontown neighborhood. When inside I had chores, one of which was the ironing.
I would set up the creaky ironing board in the kitchen close to the counter with the electrical outlet. And then I’d carefully plug in the Sunbeam, aqua iron until it was hot enough to smooth away the folds. I would iron my father’s shirts for work, my sister’s and my blouses, leaving the trickier ironing of dresses to my...
Blog Break
![Blog Break Blog Break](images/Life-SizedCourage/cache/images/Life-SizedCourage/blog/janetzinn_files_wordpress_com_2016_05/proportion/unknown_2_w140_h140/unknown_2_02090743.jpeg)
May 23, 2016 by Janet Zinn
I wasn’t planning on taking a break from my blog, but that’s what happened. I’m glad I took this break. I’ve needed a breather in general for a while, and the blog was just a part of what I needed to put aside. I enjoy writing, but I noticed something as the weeks went by without penning a word. I noticed that I felt relieved at times, and frustrated at other times. Same circumstances, different responses.
As the weeks went by I started criticizing myself. I was hard on myself for not writing even as other obligations loomed large. I’d think, “If I don’t write on a regular basis it’s predictive of not publishing later.” I questioned myself. “Could my attention...