Blog
Loss
Scaffolding, Week Thirty-Four in the New Abnormal
![Scaffolding, Week Thirty-Four in the New Abnormal Scaffolding, Week Thirty-Four in the New Abnormal](images/Life-SizedCourage/cache/images/Life-SizedCourage/proportion/IMG_4869_w140_h140/IMG_4869_08211148.jpg)
Pre-Covid, I took a wonderful writing workshop with Emily Raboteau at the Key West Writer’s Workshop. Not only was it a beautiful setting, but the guest speakers and the workshop itself were invaluable. One thing Professor Raboteau taught us was the necessity of proper scaffolding to support the writing. It took time, but I built my scaffolding. It’s been more precarious than proper, but I worked with the materials at hand and I’m finding my way.
A Good Morning, Week Thirty-Three in the New Abnormal
![A Good Morning, Week Thirty-Three in the New Abnormal A Good Morning, Week Thirty-Three in the New Abnormal](images/Life-SizedCourage/cache/images/Life-SizedCourage/proportion/IMG_4794_w140_h140/IMG_4794_08130647.jpg)
Moods Ebb & Flow, Week Twenty-Eight in the New Abnormal
![Moods Ebb & Flow, Week Twenty-Eight in the New Abnormal Moods Ebb & Flow, Week Twenty-Eight in the New Abnormal](images/Life-SizedCourage/cache/images/Life-SizedCourage/proportion/IMG_4476_w140_h140/IMG_4476_07100504.jpg)
The cycling of moods continues. Today I’m happy. It’s beautiful outside. I get to walk on fairly empty sidewalks, and I’m ticking things off my to-do list. Earlier this week I was crestfallen. Too many tragedies and so much shared pain in the world. I find it fascinating how the ups and downs shift from day to day. Well, really, from moment to moment.
Compassion vs. Disregard, Week Twenty-Seven in the New Abnormal
![Compassion vs. Disregard, Week Twenty-Seven in the New Abnormal Compassion vs. Disregard, Week Twenty-Seven in the New Abnormal](images/Life-SizedCourage/cache/images/Life-SizedCourage/proportion/IMG_4471_w140_h140/IMG_4471_07020200.jpg)
Reactivity, Week Twenty-Six in the New Abnormal
![Reactivity, Week Twenty-Six in the New Abnormal Reactivity, Week Twenty-Six in the New Abnormal](images/Life-SizedCourage/cache/images/Life-SizedCourage/proportion/IMG_1946_w140_h140/IMG_1946_08290826.jpg)
Honestly, the news this week has not been good given my values. A lot of powerful women have been sharing opinions. Yes, I concur, but I have found that it’s been challenging to be my best self in the face of these upsetting decisions. I’ve not been able to separate my reactions from the deeply disturbing news. In this moment the political is personal.
Dashed Plans, Week Twenty-Five in the New Abnormal
![Dashed Plans, Week Twenty-Five in the New Abnormal Dashed Plans, Week Twenty-Five in the New Abnormal](images/Life-SizedCourage/cache/images/Life-SizedCourage/proportion/IMG_4383_w140_h140/IMG_4383_06190111.jpg)
A Trip to the Equator, Week 20 in the New Abnormal
![A Trip to the Equator, Week 20 in the New Abnormal A Trip to the Equator, Week 20 in the New Abnormal](images/Life-SizedCourage/cache/images/Life-SizedCourage/proportion/IMG_3992_w140_h140/IMG_3992_05140934.jpg)
No one could have prepared me for the beauty of Ecuador. Wherever I turn the vista is extraordinary. The pictures barely capture the awe that we’re experiencing. Going on vacation is the refresh I so needed.
Welcome Spring, Week Twelve in the New Abnormal
![Welcome Spring, Week Twelve in the New Abnormal Welcome Spring, Week Twelve in the New Abnormal](images/Life-SizedCourage/cache/images/Life-SizedCourage/proportion/IMG_3377_w140_h140/IMG_3377_03201205.jpg)
Hello Spring, you couldn’t come soon enough. We’ve all needed to lighten our loads. And what better way to start than by taking off our parkas? Like the shining moon hidden under the clouds, you’ve come from behind the cold for renewed hope.
Tech Unsaavy and More, Week Eight in the New Abnormal
![Tech Unsaavy and More, Week Eight in the New Abnormal Tech Unsaavy and More, Week Eight in the New Abnormal](images/Life-SizedCourage/cache/images/Life-SizedCourage/proportion/IMG_3126_w140_h140/IMG_3126_02200119.jpg)
I don’t really understand Instagram. I’ve heard it’s for boomers. As a Baby Boomer, I am virtually clueless on how to navigate this social media platform. I can send hearts to a photo, but opening attachments, or anything more than loving a post eludes me. I keep meaning to find a tutorial I can follow, but my time is spoken for, so learning how to use Instagram stays low on my to-do list. I post to Instagram weekly. I’m not sure if it goes through, or if people just see pictures but can’t open the attachments.
The Winter of Our Discontent, Week Seven in the New Abnormal
![The Winter of Our Discontent, Week Seven in the New Abnormal The Winter of Our Discontent, Week Seven in the New Abnormal](images/Life-SizedCourage/cache/images/Life-SizedCourage/proportion/IMG_3094_w140_h140/IMG_3094_02130100.jpg)
Omicron in the Time of Coronavirus, Week Five in the New Abnormal
![Omicron in the Time of Coronavirus, Week Five in the New Abnormal Omicron in the Time of Coronavirus, Week Five in the New Abnormal](images/Life-SizedCourage/cache/images/Life-SizedCourage/proportion/IMG_3013_w140_h140/IMG_3013_01300138.jpg)
Whenever I find myself feeling righteous for some reason life humbles me, reminding me that in so many ways we’re all in this together. I had staved off Coronavirus since February 2020. I felt proud of my record. When Omicron came on the scene I started wearing masks indoors and out. I felt mostly protected from the virus and the cold. All was well. That ended a couple of weeks ago when I contracted the virus and was put out for days.
Thank You For Your Kindness, Week Four in the The New Abnormal
![Thank You For Your Kindness, Week Four in the The New Abnormal Thank You For Your Kindness, Week Four in the The New Abnormal](images/Life-SizedCourage/cache/images/Life-SizedCourage/proportion/IMG_3008_w140_h140/IMG_3008_01231227.jpg)
Small kindnesses have huge impacts. This week I hadn’t felt well, and the comments, texts, calls, messages, and extra care have been particularly meaningful. Larry, my husband, asked me if he could help take care of me, if I would let him. The truth is I usually don’t let him help me. I can be stubbornly independent, even at my own expense. So, I “let” him. Every query to see if there was anything he could do was welcomed. He made trips to the pharmacy to find the right over-the-counter remedies. He cooked or ordered dinner. We chatted casually. Something we don’t often have a chance to do.
So Long, 2021, Week 35 in the Time of Transition
![So Long, 2021, Week 35 in the Time of Transition So Long, 2021, Week 35 in the Time of Transition](images/Life-SizedCourage/cache/images/Life-SizedCourage/proportion/IMG_2859_w140_h140/IMG_2859_12260445.jpg)
2021 was so, so long. In this last week I have little interest in reviewing this past year. The fact that I, that we, got through it is good enough for me.
Generosity of Spirit, Week 34 in the Time of Transition
![Generosity of Spirit, Week 34 in the Time of Transition Generosity of Spirit, Week 34 in the Time of Transition](images/Life-SizedCourage/cache/images/Life-SizedCourage/proportion/IMG_2810_w140_h140/IMG_2810_12190118.jpg)
I always thought I was a generous person. Then I got married and I came to realize that I was only generous in certain circumstances. If something was my idea, great, I was happy to offer services, a gift, or lend an ear. However, if asked, I found I could be withholding. Somehow I felt being asked for something implied I was stingy. And I was. Sometimes I still am. Apparently a generous heart is not a one way endeavor.
We Are Not Okay, Week 33 in the Time of Transition
![We Are Not Okay, Week 33 in the Time of Transition We Are Not Okay, Week 33 in the Time of Transition](images/Life-SizedCourage/cache/images/Life-SizedCourage/proportion/IMG_2757_w140_h140/IMG_2757_12120435.jpg)
I’m finding this holiday season to be quite odd. On the one hand, many of us are able to travel, visit with friends and family, and celebrate the holidays in person rather than on Zoom. On the other hand, our nervous systems have been taxed beyond what we thought possible as we forge ahead.
Looking Back, Week 32 in the Time of Transition
![Looking Back, Week 32 in the Time of Transition Looking Back, Week 32 in the Time of Transition](images/Life-SizedCourage/cache/images/Life-SizedCourage/proportion/IMG_2734(1)_w140_h140/IMG_2734(1)_12050340.jpg)
I had some ideas about what I’d be addressing for this blog post, but when I looked at my calendar, I saw that it’s been four years since my mother died. We had a complicated relationship. Yet, in the last year of her life as her health declined, we found common ground with a deep and enduring love. A time I will always treasure. Most people don’t get that opportunity. Understanding that death is inevitable, her dying days were filled with peace and love.
Thank you Mr. Sondheim, Week 31 in the Time of Transition
![Thank you Mr. Sondheim, Week 31 in the Time of Transition Thank you Mr. Sondheim, Week 31 in the Time of Transition](images/Life-SizedCourage/cache/images/Life-SizedCourage/proportion/IMG_2657_w140_h140/IMG_2657_11281212.jpg)
I was working at Strawbridge and Clothier in the Men’s shoe department. This was a branch in the Echelon Mall in Voorhees, NJ, a short commute to Philadelphia. I was a student at Rutger’s University in Camden, still a theater major, though I would finish with a degree in English. Paul Puccio, an English major at another college, who worked in Men’s Furnishings, introduced me to the music of Stephen Sondheim. I was 18 years old. He was enamored with Follies and Alexis Smith. He invited me over to his home where I listened to his original Broadway cast album with Paul narrating to a neophyte. I was changed for life.
Don't Get Caught with Tattered Underwear, Week 29 in the Time of Transition
![Don't Get Caught with Tattered Underwear, Week 29 in the Time of Transition Don't Get Caught with Tattered Underwear, Week 29 in the Time of Transition](images/Life-SizedCourage/cache/images/Life-SizedCourage/proportion/IMG_2519_w140_h140/IMG_2519_11140257.jpg)
Cloudy, Week Fifteen in the Time of Transition
![Cloudy, Week Fifteen in the Time of Transition Cloudy, Week Fifteen in the Time of Transition](images/Life-SizedCourage/cache/images/Life-SizedCourage/proportion/IMG_1407_w140_h140/IMG_1407_06270426.jpg)
I shifted my routine earlier this week to catch the sunrise. Typically I relish the space between sleep and daytime. The sweet spot of the morning. Following those moments I shift into meditation, then move on from there with coffee and the rest of the day. As soon as I awoke I brushed my teeth and ran to the East River to get a glimpse of the sunrise.